Saturday, March 08, 2008

Three Good Arguments that Jesus was a....???




There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Jewish:

1.He went into his father's business.

2. He lived at home until he was 33

3. He was sure his Mother was a virgin and his Mother
Was sure He was God

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Italian:

1. He talked with His hands

2. He had wine with His meals

3. He used olive oil

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was a Californian:

1. He never cut His hair

2. He walked around barefoot all the time

3. He started a new religion

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was an American Indian:

1. He was at peace with nature

2. He ate a lot of fish

3. He talked about the Great Spirit

But then there were 3 equally good arguments that Jesus was Irish:

1. He never got married.

2. He was always telling stories.

3. He loved green pastures.

There were 3 good arguments that Jesus was Black:

1. He called everyone brother

2. He liked Gospel

3 . He didn't get a fair trial

But the most compelling evidence of all - 3 proofs that Jesus was a woman:

1. He fed a crowd at a moment's notice when there was virtually no food

2. He kept trying to get a message across to a bunch of men who just didn't get it

3. And even when He was dead, He had to get up because there was still work to do.

3 comments:

Marc Axelrod said...

Hilarious!

Joel said...

pretty funny stuff! What makes you think that Jesus never cut his hair? Just wondering.

Maria said...

I'm afraid the Californian argument just doesn't fly -- how was John the Baptist supposed to untie his sandals if he was always barefoot (and if Jesus was a true Californian, he would have been wearing flip flops)? As Joel points out, someone conflated him with the Baptist. And finally, did he really start a new religion?

I'm partial to the final proof, naturally.